Thursday, September 17, 2009

Cooking Therapy

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I have felt out of sorts for the last few days. I don't know any word for it other than homesick. I feel like I fit in fine here but there is always that little "something" missing. I love the people here but I have to say that they are so different than what I am used to and I can't put my finger on why. I am from Los Angeles and you would think that I was used to "tough". Tough really isn't the word I am thinking of but there is this edge that I don't have and I am not sure that I understand it around me.

Moving from San Francisco to Massachusetts should have been easy. I was getting away from everyone having a cause and having to be PERFECTLY politically correct. I found that I fit in more with that state of mind rather than a sort of the state of mind that I can't put my finger on. So I have felt sad and misunderstood and just generally feeling sorry for myself (I am allowed).

What do I do when I get this way? Cook. I cook things that remind me of where I came from and things that smell familiar and all of that. So, this morning I pulled out my recipe file from the cabinet. I have had this since the 70's when I got married (the first time). I was a cooking fool back then too. I was really young when I got married and my then husband and I were really into Cajun cooking. As the years went on it just kept morphing. I have to say that most of the recipes in this box are from back then but the one I pulled out this morning was from 1999 (which is when I started dating Dr. Food). I have NO idea where this came from or why I have it. It was out of a GQ magazine. I don't know if someone gave it to me or what.

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I read the article for the first time today. It was about the writers socialist grandmother. I had one of those. I just felt that it was some kind of "roots" thing. The article reminded me of family (and I am already homesick so it doesn't take much) and that was good enough for me.

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It is just a chocolate cake. I will let you know how it is. I made it for my pals that are going to be visiting me from Portland, Oregon.

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Sometimes simple is good. I think that when I am homesick it is the simple that I am craving. That could just be because sometimes it is tiring trying to fit in to a new place and I miss the old place where being me was much easier. So when I am homesick I go do simple things. Today it was visiting a local farm to buy a vegetable for tonights dinner and some farm fresh eggs. I couldn't do this back home but it seems to make me feel better.

Farm fresh eggs

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Chard and leeks from the farm

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Coffee from the coffee roaster across the way from the farm

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Utopian Chocolate Cake
4 squares unsweetened baking chocolate
2C flour
2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/2 sticks butter
2 C sugar
3 eggs
2 C buttermilk
4 tsp vanilla

Icing 1 box powdered sugar
1 Stick butter
1 tbl milk

Melt chocolate over very low flame. In a large bowl, combine flour; baking soda and salt and set aside. In a separat bowl, beat buttr and sugar until fluffy, then add eggs. Alternately mix in flour mixture and buttermilk, a third at a time. Blend in melted chocolate and vanilla. Pour into a 9 x 13 inch greased and floured cake pan. Bake at 3:50 degrees for 30 to 40 minutes. ake is done when a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean.

For icing, beat ingredients in food processor until smooth, then frost cake.

FYI....*I* just realized I forgot the vanilla. Seems that this could be the last straw but I am just not going to allow it to be. I will let you know how the cake is. Guests just called and are on their way.

7 comments :

  1. A very comforting cake when things are going a little rough. It's always a transition when moving from one city to another (or coast to coast). Hopefully you'll slowly begin to feel better about it all!

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  2. Don't worry -I understand and it's definitely not just you! I also moved to MA about a year ago and have found it much harder to meet people here than anywhere else I've lived! That cake looks like it will help do the trick on a homesick day!

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  3. dear janis,

    i'm from korea and my husband is from australia so we are with you ^^ i'm sure that you feel already much better after that chocolate cake.

    Short

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  4. I moved to the UK from France 8 months ago and just like you it's not easy every day but .. cooking and comford food are your best friends!

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  5. moving is never easy and feeling homesick never fun. your chocolate cake looks like the perfect medicine! :)

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  6. Feeling homesick can not be easy! I think I'd turn to cooking too. Chocolate cake sounds like the perfect remedy!

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  7. Being away from people who understand you is tough. Having lived "away from home," on a different continent, for 18 yeras, I sometimes feel no one really understands me (I'll never prefectly fit in where I live now, and I certainly don't fit in at "home" anymore.)

    Food and cooking truly can be therapy. It can bring back memories and make us feel good, a bit more "at home"...

    I hope the cake is delicious! :)

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